blessed – Liz's Gypsy Journey

What do you say?

October 1, 2019October 1, 2019 Liz's Gypsy Journey2 Comments

For 10,632 days I was lucky enough to have an amazing woman by my side. She was thoughtful, loving, caring, drove you to be your best and supported me through every moment on my life. 62 days ago I told her I loved her for the last time and stood by her bed as she took her last breath.

When it comes this amazing woman and what she meant to me there isn’t enough words. She loved me like her own, loved me like a sister, loved me like a cousin. She wasn’t just a friend but someone that held me from day one and continued to be there no matter what. When she was diagnosed with breast cancer a little over two years ago I’ll never forget when she looked at my aunt in that doctors office and said we are going to beat this. She had the best outlook and most positive outlook on life. She fought hard and she fought it her way. She tried and did find the good in every day even if she wasn’t having a good day. She always made sure the people she loved knew it.

To say my heart is broke is an understatement. In the last 62 days I have been trying to find myself and who I am without her. I have been trying to learn to lean on people more than ever, that its ok to cry even tho you don’t want to and that the people that have your back will take you in no matter what mood you are in. I know one day I’ll get back to my new normal but getting there is a hard task. I know I’m ok because she taught me how to be strong, how to fight for the things I love and how to live life to the fullest.

One of my best friends sent me a quote when I took a road trip to help clear my head and it hit home with me more than any other quote today. “I believe the hardest part of healing after you’ve lost someone you love, is to recover the ‘you’ that went away with them.” I can honestly say that quote couldn’t be more true. Finding that part is a journey, one that I am still trying to work out.

Even tho I am hurting, numb, heartbroken, sad, and pissed at times I know she would want me to live my life and live it to the fullest. Anytime I had or did something she didn’t fully approve of I would get the eye roll and “oh Elizabeth Ann” but she would always smile at the end and tell me she loved me. I can still hear and see her doing it and that makes my heart happy.

Kimberly Benfield Porter will never be forgotten and will be cherished and remembered for my entire life. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without her. She was my go to person, rock, mentor, sister, best friend and confidant. There is a place in my heart that will always be hers and a place I will forever be grateful for. Grateful for the talks, concerts, car rides, sugar cookie baking, sleepovers, laughs, hugs, smiles and tears.

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month and until this year. Well until the last two years it never hit home quite like this year is. This year it has a whole new meaning. To the survivors that kicked its ass you are stronger than you realize. To the woman we have lost you are still loved beyond measure. To the woman that will eventually put on their gloves and fight it, we are in your corner. Cancer doesn’t define you or who you are. Your legacy is what you have given to others and what you have done with your life. Live your life to the fullest and love hard. Life is to short to not be happy. Do what you want, be who you are, love yourself and find the good in everyday.

Free

December 31, 2018 Liz's Gypsy JourneyLeave a comment

As we say good bye today to 2018 I find myself looking back over the past year. It was a year of love, hope, travel, sadness and learning more about who I am. I love reflecting on the years past. I love to look back and see where I was and where I am today. My goal for 2018 wasn’t to be anyone but me. I wanted to focus on myself and do what I wanted to do. For me traveling gives me the time to think and ponder about life. It is my me time. The time that I give to myself to think through life.

This last year I learned to say no to things I didn’t want to do. I learned that you can be yourself and that the people that love you will still be by your side. I learned that even tho you love someone it doesn’t mean that you are always going to agree with them but you can still respect them. I learned that diversity is one of my favorite things now days. I learned that I am a total gypsy. I would rather be traveling, learning on the road and seeing new things every day then staying in one place for a long time. I have learned that you can be a good person and love your family and friends while you are on the road.

I have been in big cities, small towns, listened to the waves crash in the Pacific ocean and listened to the waves crash in the Atlantic ocean all in this year. I have met people that would give you the shirt off their back and people that wouldn’t. I have come to love the noise of the big cities. The sounds of cars, people talking, tall buildings surrounding you and just the amazing sites you can find in the big cities. I find myself feeling so small in those busy cities and sometimes find myself standing against a building just soaking in the hustle of the busy streets and smiling.

I learned that even while being away from “home” you can find home wherever you are. You can still be a true friend that is only a phone call away. You can be an aunt that is trying to show the little people in her life that it is ok to chase their dreams and if there is a will there is a way. Life isn’t about being unhappy or money but life is to be lived. My all time favorite quote is “To live would be an awfully big adventure!” and believe in that quote full heartedly. I have coached some of the greatest girls in little league and learned that even while being competitive it is ok to just fall in love with the game all over again.

This year has been a learning year. It has been a year where there were moments where I just wanted to sit down and cry while other days I couldn’t be happier. I think that is how every year is but this year I feel like I grew more into the person I wanted to be. I quit thinking so much about what others think and just let down my guard and said this is me. I pierced my nose after wanting it for years and one of my best friends told me “hey it’s your life and you have to do what makes you happy and forget what others think, just be you.” Thanks Em for always having my back and supporting my crazy ideas. I love with everything I am. I try to see the best in everyone. I would give anything I had to the ones I love and overall just try to be a good human.

I am definitely not perfect and I have definitely made my mistakes but everyday I try my best to find the good in the world. I try to find the happy in every day. I try to be there for my people and I try to be there for myself. As I continue to say goodbye to 2018 I also want to thank this year. Thank you for teaching me, opening doors, keeping myself and loved ones safe and thank you for the memories. There is so many amazing memories that happened this year. Thank you for true friends that are there no matter what. I have some of the best in my corner and I don’t know where I would be without my support system.

So here is to 2019! A year of more change, travel, friendship and a year of becoming more of myself. Happy New Year!

It’s the most wonderful time of the year..

December 27, 2018 Liz's Gypsy Journey2 Comments

As December came in fast I feel like it is leaving just as quick. After only a couple of days home I headed to Billings Montana for a quick trip to pick up a couple dogs for some friends. The drive was beautiful and showed an amazing winter wonderland. One the way back from Montana I was able to stop for the night and visit with Arlene and Kelly. It is always great to see them. I even got to stop and give my sister Britt a quick hug which is always worth the trip.

One December 9th I got to board one of Southwest Airlines Boeing 737 and was once again Seattle Washington bound to visit family. This time my carry on bag didn’t hold the normal extra things you need to travel but instead held my new digital camera that my dad gave me for Christmas. I definitely couldn’t wait to use it in Seattle. A quick one hour and thirty minute flight and I was safe and sound in one of the best cities.

The trip was amazing as usual. Christel took me to all the tourist spots, we hit the Seattle Underground tour, the museum of Pop Culture, Chihuly Garden and Glass and Smith Tower. I also took a afternoon to walk from my cousin Kirsi’s building where she works up to the Gum Wall and Pike Place Market. The gum wall was definitely a sight to see. I found it so interesting and just artistic in a weird way.

The Underground Tour was very neat. They taught us all about how Seattle started and all the struggles that took to build it. It was so neat to see the buildings that were still under the newer buildings and how they built the underground. After the tour we decided to walk across the street and tour the very first skyscraper built which is the Smith Tower. It has a amazing bar at the top of it that once you go through the self guided tour you can ride the elevator up and have a drink as well as walk around the top of the building and see the sights of Seattle.

The Museum Of Pop Culture is definitely always a favorite of mine. I love to go see the exhibits that showcase the bands that are from Seattle. This time the main exhibit was the Pearl Jam exhibit. I loved getting to learn more about the band and all the trials they went through to get to be where they are today and some of their stage props and instruments. Along with the Pearl Jam exhibit they also have an exhibit that showcases Nirvana and Jimmy Hendricks. It is definitely a place to check out.

After the Museum Of Pop Culture we went to the Chihuly Garden and Glass. This exhibit was absolutely incredible! Chihuly’s glassblowing is absolutely breath taking. His work is above and beyond what I thought it was going to be. I loved every room in the exhibit. Each piece left you wondering how did he decide to make that piece. I loved that in some of the rooms they actually featured the painting that went with the blown glass art work. He has an incredible talent!

The rest of the time I was spending time with my family. Enjoying my cousins and learning about photography from my cousin Ken. The last night I was there I met up with my cousin Kirsi and her friends. We found this bar called the Pie Bar and yes they served homemade pies and alcohol. How can you go wrong? I spent my last day in Seattle with Kirsi attending the farmers market and eating amazing Italian food before I had to take off back home.

Once I was home I had got to pick up my puppy. I couldn’t wait to have Sounders home with me to snuggle and love. He is a pretty cool little guy and I definitely am in love.

I also had a week to get everything done and ready for Christmas. This year I actually wasn’t shopping last minute. I spent some time in the wood shop finishing up the gifts I wanted to make. I spent Christmas Eve with my friend Alecia and her family. It is always a great time with them. I love the laughter that happens and just getting to spend time with them.

Christmas Morning I got up and went to Dave and Connie Simpson’s home where I married them in front of the Christmas tree in a short ceremony in front of their closest friends. It is always an honor to marry couples and this one I couldn’t be happier for. I spent the rest of Christmas visiting the neighbors who are like family and went to Jen and Jon’s to finish up the afternoon and evening. It was my fourth year with them and I love spending Christmas with them.

The day after Christmas it was time for Christmas with my dad and my sister Nicole’s family. We had a great dinner and enjoyed spending the evening together. The kids are definitely fun to watch open their gifts. Christmas through a child’s eye is definitely a great way to celebrate.

As we say good bye to 2018 in a couple days I can definitely say the last month of it was a great one. I will try and do one last blog before the new year reflecting but if I don’t get a chance to get it done. Happy New Year!